Agree to Disagree

Skyping a friend from home, and then taking a second to realize where I am. While she was speaking to me from her bedroom in NY, I was speaking to her from my classroom on the Kibbutz, which happens to be a bomb shelter. Twice today sirens went off, once in the morning, and once again in the evening. We were warned in advance that this week there will be national emergency drills for the next couple of days.  The other day I went swimming on a Kibbutz 10 minutes from mine, and noticed something a bit odd about the childrens' swing structure. It was made out of an old missile. Playing "Call of Duty" (video game) shooting virtual weapons, and then seeing the same weapon from the game in front of me, knowing that this one had the actual ability to kill. Being told that Israeli's won't read a resume if it's longer than one page, "we just don't have time for that. there is always a war going on." A reality that the citizens of this country live in, and that I will soon be a part of.

As my program, Intensive Arabic Semester, is down to the final couple weeks, I am thankful for the invaluable cultural experiences this program has allowed me to partake in. To think I came here to Wadi Ara (a region an hour north of Tel Aviv) 4 months ago, and can now speak hours on end in Arabic, is beyond gratifying. I have been surrounded by the same group of people for the past several months, participating in a program run by an open-minded organization, Givat Haviva  (winner of the UNESCO prize for peace education). I went to Tel Aviv a couple days ago for a meeting for "Olim Chadashim" (new immigrants to Israel). I was in utter shock from the reaction I got when I told the group I was studying Arabic. One girl asked me "if the Arabs are really short." and then continued on to ask me "so they must be talking about Syria right? I'm sure that's all they're talking about right now; their loyalty to Syria." When I told the advisor of the program that I am studying Arabic, she looked at me in disgust, and asked me why. She then told me I should omit from my resume where I live. 

After returning from Tel Aviv, a city with virtually no Arabs, I have realized how just an hour south from my home, people's mindsets are completely different. How could I even go about explaining what I have learned the past several months? I can't. It's something you have to experience for yourself. 

In the meantime, I'm taking advantage of every day I have left here on Kibbutz Barkai. Soon I will be living in the crazy city of Tel Aviv, looking for a job, and studying Hebrew! I still plan to continue my Arabic studies as well. 

Today I am also thankful for the American soldiers who have lost their lives fighting for America. #MemorialDay

As you may know, since my last blog post, I am in the process of becoming an Israeli citizen. This decision came after much thought, and weeks of weighing the pros and cons. Of course moving to a new country, alone, is not easy. I know I will have many challenges ahead of me, but I am ready to take them head-on. I go through phases of being excited, and others of feeling nervous. I have been extremely thankful for the support of my parents, family, and friends since I made the final decision. When I tell anyone from the states I am making Aliyah, they all seem happy for me, and say Congrats. I seem to get a mixed response from Israelis. Many ask me why I would want to live here instead of America, and others think I'm crazy. It is hard to explain to an Israeli the large cultural differences between the States and here. No country is perfect, but if I left now, I know would regret it.

I understand that my life now is a "bubble" in a way. I live on a Kibbutz, in the middle of Wadi Ara, with an amazing group of people that I have grown very close to. I study Arabic, and have it pretty easy. I know when I choose to establish myself here, it won't always be like this.

On Wednesday, I got the opportunity to travel with a 10th grade class from Baqa-Al Gharbiyye (an Arab city 10 min from the Kibbutz) to a High school in Tel Aviv (with Jewish students). Both classes have been reading the same novel, "A time to Kill" for the past several months, in their respective English classes. When I found out this novel was about rape, and murder, I was surprised. For some reason, I did not think an Arab school would teach such controversial topics. This program, called "Book Club" was taking place for the first time. It is a program funded through Harvard, which payed for the books and coordinator. It was interesting to watch the Arab students interact with the Israelis. They sat divided on separate sides before the discussion began.  Perhaps this same thing would have happened if any two High school classes were to meet. I am not sure. Some interesting cultural difference emerged. The hosting school had provided snacks for all of the students. The staff of the Jewish school did not understand why the Arab students would not eat any. Someone from my program explained how the Arab students must be offered the food, they won't just dig in. The staff began dividing the food on plates and serving it. The classes were divided into mixed groups, where they had to answer questions about the novel. It was nice watching the Arab students, and Jewish students exchange ideas and opinions. They all seemed to enjoy it. On the bus ride back, some of the Arab girls were showing me and my roommate pictures on their phones. (They love to show us their iphone pictures. Yes, all of them have iphones.) We were quite concerned with one of the pictures we saw. 

"You know you're in love when that person keeps hurting you but you keep forgiving them and hoping they will change." 

Both of us reacted by saying "mish hiloo, mish sahih!" (not nice, not right). They young girls (14-15) all yelled back "noo, hiloo!" They didn't see a problem with this message. When we told the other students on our program, from America, Australia, and England, they agreed this message was disturbing and could promote domestic/emotional abuse. We further asked one of our instructors who teaches Arabic, and she actually had the same reaction "hiloo"(nice). We determined this is part of the Arab culture in this area. The girls saw this message as a positive one. Who were we to tell them otherwise. When I met with my host family in Baqa (the same city) on Thursday, I was relieved to hear  the response of my host sister (also in 10th grade) on this same picture. She reacted quite differently. She told me this message was backwards, and not right. We ended up having many deep, controversial conversations. We talked about what her expectations were of hosting an American student. Her and her family had no idea I was Jewish, all they knew is that I would be a foreigner. She told me she thought I would show up the first day in short shorts and an inappropriate outfit, like she sees on American TV. She was pleasantly surprised when I showed up dressed more conservatively. I asked her why she wanted to host an American student. Her response blew me away. She said she didn't care so much about learning English from me, but she wanted to show me, and American, that not all Muslims are the same. She wanted me to see that her family is just like many other families. They are 4 kids, and two loving parents. I have grown to see many more similarities than differences since I have started spending time with them. She said she's also learned a lot from me. She was surprised when I said I keep kosher, yet am still interested in learning about her culture. Her dad ended up joining in on the conversation. He was very pleased that we were talking about such political topics. (I was previously worried to bring these up with her, and especially her parents). What her dad had to tell me, was very saddening, but honest. We spoke in Arabic, and it was amazing to be able to have this conversation in his native language. He told me how his family is from this land (Israel) from many generations back. He gets angered that he has to be severely questioned in security checks at the airport like he's a terrorist. His daughters as well. He has been a bus driver for 10 years, yet makes the same salary as a Jewish bus driver who has only been working for one. (Unequal pay). He also explained to me how he thinks it's unjust that Israeli-Arabs must learn Hebrew in school, yet the Jews do not learn Arabic. The daughter too explained how in public school, she is only taught about the history of Israel and the Jewish people. If anything is mentioned about Arabs, it seems to be negative. (Her whole HS is Arab, yet she goes to a public school in Israel). Mai (my host sister) explained to me how she is ISRAELI. She is a citizen of Israel, and likes her life here. She sees what is going on in Syria, and surrounding Arab States, and is thankful to be here. It is true that Arab-Israelis here have much better lives than they might in the surrounding countries, but they still do not have equal rights in many parts of society here. We talked for about an hour. The father was right when he said many Americans think all Arabs are terrorists. I have heard this many times before, even from educated individuals; it is not right, and needs to stop. After this conversation we had a pretty American meal! (Coke, corn on the cob, chips, and strawberry/banana milkshakes) 

Little Deebe. Such a cutie

Oh.. and I made Dolma (grape leaves with rice) from scratch the other day. Was awesome. 

Peace out,

J